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Moving onwards!
I’m so sorry guys. I never uploaded March’s calendar page. Here it is and here is April too.
I suck. Somebody remind me in the middle of April that I need to make May and June so this doesn’t keep happening.
So anyway, I’m officially feeling happier. I’m sorry you had to put up with a few moody blues posts but this is how I work through things. I know that feeling sad is totally natural but that never seems to help when I’m in the depths of it. The sun is shining, I have a new plan to get through and I’m feeling 100% happier.
Some things need to stay private but I don’t want to be totally mysterious about my ups and downs either. Many of you have emailed me and tried to encourage me. Thank you. I’m not so sad about the friends and relatives that have died recently. It’s hard watching my Grandpa grieve but this is not what has been bringing me down.
I’ve recently received some pretty brutal criticism in how I do my bookkeeping as a freelance designer and it has sort of made me feel like a failure, which I know I am not. I just don’t like math and avoid it at all costs. Which means come tax time, I am in a world of hurt. But I have plans and methods now in place and even an appointment with a real bookkeeper who will probably pay for himself in fifteen minutes(!). So I’m moving onwards! I’m a survivor and these problems are not going to get me down!
How do you guys get yourselves out of funks? Coffee? Sunshine? A swift kick in the butt?
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rain
I promised her the beach. So we went in the late afternoon. Normally she would be napping but today was full of errands and she slept in the car on the way to the grocery store.
I tried to relax and watch the waves rush in and out. I tried to let my troubles go with them. But they were stubborn troubles and she kept interrupting me with requests for water and sand castles and what kind of shell is this again?
The water was cold so I wouldn’t take off my shoes. I refused to fetch her a pail of water. I regret that now. I should have taken off my shoes. Maybe the icy cold would have woken me up from my stupor. But I’m trying not to let her boss me around so much so I said no. And no, and no and no… on and on with the no’s. No means NO, I tell you!
And then it was time to go home and cook dinner. I let her walk up the stairs by herself, at her snails pace. I waited at the top with the stroller, trying to relax. One by one by one, she sang with each step. And then it rained on us. Not a thick torrential rain but just drops. Nothing that would melt us.
Then, finally, I relaxed.
It’s not the end of the world to be rained on.
