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B-Bug is a B-Bug*!
I was walking along today, minding my own business, when all of a sudden out of the corner of my eye I spotted a hot pink lady bug costume in a fancy schmancy boutique store near where I live. I never shop in this store. I can’t even afford to buy socks in this store. But the ladybug costume shouted at me. It was bright pink and satin and had big spots!
I stopped. I stared. I asked the nice sales ladies if I could park my giant jogger stroller in their doorway while I examined the ladybug costume up close. You know, just for ideas. Not buying anything.
“Of course!” they said cheerily. “Come on in!” And while they cooed over how cute Baby Bug is, I examined the costume thoroughly.
I’m really into costumes. I like dressing up. I could care less about Halloween (I hate scary stuff) but dressing up is plenty enough reason to celebrate. I can overlook the vampires and bloody mummies if there is any dressing up going on. Bring on the costumes! Let your imagination run free!
I’ve been wondering what to dress Baby Bug up as for Halloween. There was this one little niggling thought about how cute she would be as a bug. But… sigh… I already have several hand-me-down costumes from my many nieces shoved in her pajama drawer, just waiting to be tried on.
I really shouldn’t be spending money on these things. Not to mention, I could MAKE her a costume. I’m almost famous for doing that sort of thing, even though I can’t sew worth beans. And when would I do that? At thirteen o’clock on the second Tuesday of Never?
I even toyed with the idea of making her a teapot costume. Because she likes to sing, “I’m a Little Teapot” all the time. How cute would that be made out of some floral calico with a teapot lid for a hat? I can even visualize the shape… round in the middle, piping on the edges. Adorable. She could wear stripey off white tights. It would be perfect!
Except I can’t sew worth beans and I’d have to bribe somebody to do it for me. And then there’s the fact that Toby was traumatized by that song and doesn’t want his little girl dressing up as such a humiliating thing. I guess in Boy Scouts they do some kind of cruel and unusual hazing ritual that involves boys standing up in front of all the other scouts and making them sing “I’m a Little Teapot”. I don’t know. I was never in boy scouts.
But whatever. I don’t have time to be sewing and I think I’ve used up all my free sewing cards. The teapot idea was out. I was resigned to just dressing Baby Bug up as a “lady bug” wearing a black onsie, black tights, a red tutu and SuperChic’s old hand-me-down ladybug wings. They don’t really look like ladybug wings. They are just red spotted butterfly wings but they would work. She could be a little fairy-princess-bug or something. Isn’t that all the rage anyway?
So you can imagine my surprise when I examined the hot pink lady bug costume in the fancy schmancy boutique store and saw that the price tag said only $24!!! Twenty-four dollars! I’d pay more to buy the fabric and make it myself! My wallet danced itself out right of my purse and I bought the costume on the spot. How could I not?
When we got home we had to try it on right away. Of course Baby Bug loved it. She raced around the living room blowing raspberries because that’s what she thinks ladybugs do. It’s my fault for letting her watch this movie since she was three months old or something. I’ve corrupted her. She thinks that all bugs run around and tease each other this way. We had a lot of fun buzzing around and playing.
I’m so excited for Halloween to get here. Rapunzel and Superchic are coming to visit us and we are going to trick-or-treat this neighborhood like nobody’s business. I love being a mom (and an Aunt). You get to be a kid over and over again.
*That’s what she calls ladybugs, “bee-bugs”.
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All’s fun and games until somebody poops in the pool
It has been Hot! Hot! Hot! here. Hotter than dog’s breath, as I like to say. It really feels like dog’s breath too because it is so humid all the time. When I was out in the sticks it was about 109, sometimes 115 but it seemed way more bearable than the 93 degrees in the shade of my hot humid house with no air conditioning.
I would kill for some air conditioning. I try and try to imagine that I am in Paris or that I am the sexy señorita slaving away in the kitchen while sweat drips down the tendrils of my curly hair slipping out of it’s romantically loose bun BUT my imagination is in need of some anti-freeze or something because it just poops out and starts panting.
How do I always forget that summer is like this? I used to say that summer was my favorite time of year but this year… I’m thinking I’m way more into Fall. Fall with it’s pumpkin pies and crisp apples. Give me your tweeds and wool sweaters. I think I should move to Sweden.
Anyway! This post is not about me belly aching about the heat. It is about our NEW NEATO FEATO DEETO BLOWUP KIDDIE POOL! Yes, I wheeled the stroller down the hot-enough-to-fry-an-egg-on sidewalk this morning, to our local hardware store and bought an eight dollar blow up pool! I think it is one of the best investments I have ever made.
Baby Bug and I nearly died of heat stroke getting it at 9:30 this morning but it was so worth it. When we got home, Baby Bug took a nap and I begged Toby to blow it up for us. I tried to blow it up myself but I almost passed out. I have the lung capacity of a mouse. I saw stars and everything.
It took Toby quite a lot of trickery to get it blown up too. Who knew you need a bike pump for these things? We don’t have a bike pump. But we do have a bugaboo stroller with a handy dandy mini pump for pumping up bugaboo tires. It wasn’t a good fit but with sharp knife (for reasons I’m not sure of) Toby managed to get the silly thing blown up just in time for Baby Bug to wake up.
I take that back. He managed to get it blown up while she ate lunch in her high chair. You should have seen her excitement as the pump made it’s whoosh whoosh whoosh sound. I’m sure she had no idea what this giant blue and red plastic expanding thing was but she knew it had something to do with Fun with a capital “F”. Whoosh Whoosh Whoosh went the pump. Swing swing swing went Baby Bug’s dangling legs under her high chair. She could barely eat she was so excited.
Finally, we got the thing blown up and out on the porch to fill with water. It was so great. Playing with water is always fun with a baby but playing with water in a kiddie pool on a super super super hot day is even better! I think the only thing that might have topped it (thinking of you Laurie) would have been eating popsicles while playing in the neato feato deeto kiddie pool with a baby on a super super super hot day.
We had a blast. The best part for me is that this little body of water somehow made the temperature on our patio drop a good ten degrees. I can’t say for sure since we have no thermometer but it sure felt like it. It’s amazing how much cooler you can feel when you have your feet submerged in cold water. Bad mood heat stroke instantly gone.
And then Baby Bug had to go and poop in the pool. Yeah. You knew that was coming. She wore her diaper and bathing suit for a good hour but then the diaper became the GIANT ABSORBING DIAPER and swelled up bigger than her. She looked like a queen bee with a giant abdomen.
I changed her out of the GIANT DIAPER and into a swim diaper and that worked for about three minutes until she decided she wanted to run in and out of the house and sit on the couch and leave giant wet butt prints all over the place. So we ended up taking the swim diaper off and just standing around asking each other what we should do. Get her dressed? Block off the patio and keep her from playing in the pool? Put her in another swim diaper? What to do… what to do!
While Toby and I stood around like clueless parents, it suddenly got very quiet and next thing we knew there was a silent toddler squatting in her new kiddie pool taking a poop as if it was her own private toilet. Nothing good ever comes from a silent toddler. And poop, ugh poop. I am quickly becoming immune to the horror of poop.
I scooped the poop out with a plastic bag and Toby dumped the contaminated water over the side of our patio into our neighbor’s garden below. We made jokes about the five second rule and the fact that our pooped in pool water is probably a hundred times cleaner than the beaches in Huntington. But the sad fact was, our super duper neato feato deeto kiddie pool fun was officially over.
Until tomorrow or something.
