I accomplished three major things yesterday. I shaved my legs, I changed the sheets on our bed and I gave Baby Bug a bath. Woooo Hoooo! This is exciting stuff on this blog. But this is big for me because it was the first time in ages that I actually accomplished the things I set out to do for the day. And I did them all while Baby Bug was awake, not napping. The napping has gone to hell in a hand basket.

Baby Bug and I have not figured out how to synchronize the napping with the time I need to get things done. She likes to fall asleep with me (which is nice! a nap in the middle of the day! how grand!) or in the sling while we are on a walk or in the car. I read somewhere that if your baby falls asleep every time you take a drive then maybe she is sleep deprived. So I freaked out and started charting when she was asleep and when she was awake. She’s fine. She sleeps ten hours at night (I know!) and five during the day. She’s regular as raisin bran.

Still, the napping does not occur when I can actually get anything done. When I need to get things done, I have to hold her. ALL OF THE TIME. Once I pick her up, there’s no putting her down again. She’s too smart for that. The floor is no longer interesting once she has seen the view from above. So when she does wake up, I try and let her lay around as along as possible. At least until the pterodactyl shrieks begin.

Remember the sweet Aaaaah-boooh movie? It’s a good thing I filmed it when I did. She’s not doing that anymore. Now she’s into yelling. Happy yells but still yelling. Aaaack! Aaaack! Aaaack! she says. When she’s laying on her changing pad looking up at the Chinese paper umbrellas she yells at them because they are not moving. I rigged up a thread so that I can give it a swift tug and send the parasols swirling every time she shrieks. So there I am attempting to read emails and tugging on a thread every other second. Then I tied the thread to her hand and she loved that. Except she pulled too hard and all the umbrellas got tangled up. That was fun.

I’m learning to do things with the baby. My arms are getting very strong. I hope to have muscle definition in a few months. Maybe I’ll look like Madonna. I’m very good at holding Baby Bug now. I juggle her from one arm to the other like an experienced waitress handles a whole table full of hot steaming plates. I make Toby very nervous. He’s always looking at me with bugged out eyes like I’m going to drop her or something. What? It’s not normal to balance the baby on your elbow? Why don’t you try cutting lettuce while you hold a wiggly three month old?

I couldn’t figure out how to shave my legs and hold the baby at the same time so I let her shriek in her crib. Even though I can hear her shrieks down the hall, I put the baby monitor in the bathroom and turned the volume to low just in case. Do you know what I figured out? I learned how to make feedback squelches with the baby monitor in the bathroom. All I have to do is swing the door back and forth. It was so loud you’d think I was tuning up for a rock concert. Testing… testing… one two three, ouch that hurt. I almost woke Toby up.

I’m lucky I don’t have to shave my legs very often. For some strange genetic reason I don’t grow very much hair on my legs. Less than most people grow on their arms. During pregnancy my hair didn’t grow at all. Very strange, I know. This is a good thing and I remind myself of it everything I start loathing my pear shape.

The next chore was changing the sheets. That actually turned into a lot of fun. I’ve learned that if I cheer and make all kinds of happy sounds, I can talk Baby Bug out of getting scared. Usually something like a giant piece of cloth coming at her from the sky would make her eyes widen, her bottom lip quiver and then all hell would break lose in the form of un-soothable cries. So I laid her on the bed (smack dab in the middle to avoid any flipping off, of course) and changed the sheets around her while clapping and shouting “Yaaay! This is fun!” over and over like a moron. She loved it. She was ecstatic when I whipped the sheets up into the air above her head and then let them settle softly on her skin. There were lots of baby laughs and gummy smiles. It was a riot. I almost wanted to make the bed over and over again.

Then came bath time. I wish I could give Baby Bug a bath while she was napping. It would be so much easier to get all the fuzz out of her hand cracks if she wasn’t clenching them up so tightly. And the scum in her neck folds? Sheesh! That’s nearly impossible. I really need to give her baths more often so she gets used to them. Right now we’re lucky if we get two a week. Mostly because in the morning and the evening it’s too cold and in the middle of the day the sun is shining into the kitchen window so brightly it blinds you. It’s never the right time to take a bath. I know, excuses excuses… I’m pathetic.

We managed the bath and she only cried a little bit. I love a nice clean baby. We put lotion and powder on (even though Toby hates anything that smells like anything) and then I carried her around for the rest of the day smelling her fuzzy head. That lasted until I stopped by a local taco joint for dinner and dropped a glop of salsa on her head. Way to go Mommy!

But all in all, it was a very successful day. Here’s to tomorrow!