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Cake the Cat Costume!
You know what happens when your mom makes costumes regularly for her blogging job? You think store-bought costumes are the best thing ever. It happened to me too. My mom sewed a pumpkin costume for me and my brother when we were little. We wore cute little green hats and green tights and we were the cutest round chubby pumpkins you ever did see. I would give a zillion dollars to see a photo of us back then but guess what? I HATED THAT COSTUME! I wanted to be like the other kids who got to wear make up and dress up as gypsies and black cats. There were no princess costumes back then or I’m sure I would have wanted to be that too.
Bug humored me with the Galaxy Costume and she really did genuinely love it but you know what she really really really wanted deep down? A store-bought Fionna from Adventure Time costume. This is where I have to look sheepish and admit I have never even watched Adventure Time and I don’t really know what my kid watches when she is with her dad so it might be highly inappropriate but I figured if Bethany’s kids watched that show and they loved it then it must not be too terrible. Annalie actually has great taste. So I ordered it from one of those costume sites while we drove down the road on the way to Payam’s mom’s house. (Don’t worry, I wasn’t driving.) It was a total impulse buy to appease my kid for some other unfairness that I have completely forgotten about. Then later (of course) I did a little research and fretted about the shortness of the skirt and the hoochiness of the knee socks. That’s how I parent.
Bug was on the moon. She couldn’t wait for that costume to arrive. She talked about it constantly. She even talked Joon into being Cake the Cat as her companion. Only problem was that there weren’t any Cake the Cat costumes that we could order online.
You know what that means!!! I had to make Joon a Cake the Cat costume. Poor me! Hahahahahhahaha!
That was the best thing ever for me. Joon and I headed off to Target to find a big fluffy white sweatshirt. Then we waited in line at the fabric store for our 1/8 yard of off-white felt and 1 yard of yellowish-orange felt. Or maybe it’s blanket felting. It’s nice durable fabric, not the kind that falls apart in the wash.
Joon loves helping me with projects. She is my number one assistant. Unlike Bug who has been there, done that and is so over it already. Joon loves to tag along with me everywhere. She even told the cutting lady what we needed while I took a quick bathroom break. When we got home I got to work. I sewed up a tail (trying not to make it look like a penis, which is totally hard!), some ears and cut out some big orange-yellow spots. Then I attached everything to the sweatshirt. It took a while and the felting kinda moved as I sewed, making everything ever-so-slightly off center but Joon LOVED IT!!
She wanted to wear it the day I made it which was days before the Halloween parade at school and Halloween itself. She wanted to wear it as a sweatshirt to school the next day and pajamas that night. Joon’s appreciation for my homemade costume swelled my heart up so big.
Unfortunately, it also brought out the green-eyed monster in Fionna. Nothing went right with her store-bought costume. The skirt was age-appropriately knee-length and not butt-hugging like the character in the cartoon. The shirt didn’t fall off her shoulder. Her hair was the wrong color and everything WAS ALL WRONG! It was a disaster. So I gave in and altered the store-bought costume. Not too terribly hoochie-mama but just a little bit. It was a compromise. Then I let her wear some really light pink blush and lip gloss and all was well again. The things I do, man. Parenting winner over here.
Anyway, Cake the Cat was awesome and Fionna was too. They actually even hung out together at the school dance/parade which is huge for Bug because she’s the cool kid and little half sisters are so uncool. I know. We are working on that. They actually get along famously but you know how it goes.
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Hortons
About that “beating pillow cases with tennis rackets” phrase: My friend Teri has been going through a lot of difficult trials lately. One after the other would hit her over the head with no warning and no relief or solution in sight and of course no logical explanation. Times can get tough exponentially sometimes and coping is so difficult when it goes on day after day after day… She’s a trooper of course and she has held her own better than anyone else I know. I love that I am surrounded by strong friends but it’s so hard when you see a friend going through a difficult time and you just don’t know how to help. I’m sure I have in my own way but not as much as I wish I could.
Teri recently flew up to Seattle to visit some friends and a friend of her’s booked her some kind of temper-tantrum therapy session. I know, it sounds absolutely ridiculous but the truth is, it worked and it was amazing according to Teri. At one point during her trip she texted me that she was going to “beat pillows with tennis rackets” and the phrase stuck with me because that was the level of rage I was feeling at that moment as I dealt with the security measures it takes to prove that you are you and you are not trying to hack your own website. Seriously.
And guess what? My doctor called me today and my thyroid is totally normal. Boo. I guess I’m just ill-behaved and I need to work harder to manage my moods. Not the answer I was hoping for but I am actually thankful that I am healthy. That’s always a good thing. Ha!
Another phrase Teri introduced me to is “hortons.” She has three nearly-grown-up girls and they refer to their hormones as hortons. As in, “I have too many hortons and they are sucking up my will to live.” Isn’t that the perfect word for hormones? Kind of like a giant elephant in the room who we are ignoring even though he is so big he is taking up the entire living room rug and his nasty peanut breath is stifling everyone.
Bug has hortons. They are hitting big time and they are crazy all over the place. The poor girl had it coming with two (moody) artists for parents. I knew this would happen and I know I am the best person equipped to help her through puberty but it rips my heart out to see her go through what I have gone through all these years. The highs are so high, the lows are so low. We’re not talking bi-polar or anything, though I’m sure in some circles it would be considered that. But it is really hard when things are low.
So when we actually agreed on a costume to make for Alphamom this year and Bug actually liked doing the craft with me and wasn’t forced against her will, you can imagine how happy that made me. It was like old times! I miss crafting with this girl. I often find myself going through old posts to find something and when I see her chubby little three-year-old cherub face as she paints with me, it just makes me want to build a time machine and go back and steal her! And then she wanted to go take pictures with me! My favorite model wanted to be photographed!!! It was the best. She was so fun. I could take pictures of her all day long. Wait. Maybe I’ve already done that. (Scratches head, furrows eyebrows.)
She is still fun. She has the best sense of humor and she cracks me up like nobody’s business but she also has a free will and crafting and modeling are NOT her thing presently. Dang it. She’ll watch DIY channels on Youtube all day long and primp in the mirror for hours but crafting/photographing with mom is sooooo 2008. (Rolls eyes until they fall out and roll away on the floor, leaving a bloody trail.)
Payam took this picture of us a few days ago and I love it so much. Of course you have no idea by looking at it what is actually going on. It looks like a mom and daughter who love each other and who are having a great time but what you don’t actually know is that we are in the middle of an argument about how we should pose our feet. Bug is two seconds away from being exasperated with me because it’s sooooo difficult to stand like I am and she can barely hold her body up and she’s tiiiiiiiiiiired and taking pictures is DUMB. People who take pictures and post them on their phones are dumb and if her mom would look up from her phone once in a while she would realize that her daughter is starving for attention and life is going by and look there’s a pretty bird in the tree but never mind you would NEVER understand, so I’m just going to go play minecraft for the rest of the day. Send food. Preferably tacos, or In-and-Out but nothing with gooey cheese because that’s disgusting.
So yeah. We’ve got hortons in this house. And by we, I’m including myself. It’s been tricky, especially for Payam and I know it’s only going to get worse. I’m thinking maybe the girls and I will have a tennis-racket-meet-pillow session when they come back next week. It would probably be good for all of us.
Also, aren’t they most beautiful girls you have ever seen? Puberty is a fickle pickle.
