• 15 minute posts,  I'm an idiot,  Life Lessons,  my books,  place holder posts,  Slow News Day,  spilling my guts

    News from the Trenches

    trenches1
    I’m feeling a little bit overwhelmed over here but what else is new, right? You know how when you move into a new place, you manage to keep it perfectly clean and orderly for about a year and a half. Maybe it’s a month and a half for you, but you know what I mean. You have some sense of control over your environment because you just moved into a new place and you unpacked everything to go exactly where it’s supposed to go?

    And then after that honeymoon of everything being so fresh and new, you start to let go of control a little. The carpet isn’t always vacuumed everyday and your daughter tracks in bits of grass and the laundry isn’t quite folded the exact same day you washed it and the tracks in your shower door are starting to get moldy and gross and the grout in your kitchen tile is starting to collect coffee grinds…bla bla bla…?

    No?

    Maybe it’s just me. I’m having one of those everything-is-gross-and-I’m-really-super-hyper-aware-of-it moments. Like I drank too much coffee and I need to pick at everything kinda feeling. I hate that. Life can be a little too vivid sometimes. I need to dial my awareness back a notch or drink two glasses of wine instead of the usual one.

    Anyway, I just wanted to check in and say hi before I have to slap up another sponsored post. You guys are going to start thinking I only blog for money these days. Sad. Pathetic. What happened to my life where I blogged every little fart that passed?

    So what else is new?

    I dabbled in a little online dating this week. Of the free variety. What a crock!!! Oh my goodness. You know, there are a lot of creeps out there. I started chatting with three guys and all three of them turned out to be scam artists. In fact they may have all been the same scam artist using three different profiles. Thankfully, I caught on before I gave them my social security number and credit cards. Sheesh! Maybe the magazine-quality bio photos should have been a red flag? Hmmm….. I may be lonely but I’m not that lonely. I have met two real people who seem to be interesting. It’s kind of scary and fun at the same time. I’m not sure how I feel about it.

    I just hope they are as old and hopeless as I am. Or that they aren’t as old and hopeless as I am. It’s scary meeting people that you don’t know. You advertise your best self and then they are disappointed when you show up with a few extra pounds and a double chin or you under-advertise and you end up meeting whackos who are so insecure you have three online fights with them over whether or not you are really interested enough to meet in public. Maybe meeting someone at a bar is not so bad after all. I’m starting to think I do need to be drunk to date again.

    But don’t worry. I’m fine. It was just something fun one day when I was bored and Bug was away on vacation with her dad. I am not becoming one of those moms who goes out every night. I probably am not going to meet anyone until I’m 60. We’ll have a hot shuffleboard date.

    Secondly. I’m a little bent out of shape with amazon.com lately. Have you noticed my book is out of stock every single day? I thought it was because it was so popular it was flying off the shelves. No. That is not the case at all. I sold about 37 books. Seriously.

    They are just not printing them. Some kind of distribution battle between the actual printer and amazon. I’m just over it. If you want to buy my books, I say click over to Barnes and Noble. They don’t seem to have a problem keeping them on the virtual shelves.

    In other book news, I will be reading at the Mesa Verde Library in Costa Mesa this Thursday the 12th at 7pm. I plan to do a little craft too and I don’t have anyone lined up to read the French parts for me so that might be a little piece of entertainment for you locals. Come listen to me make a fool of myself!

    What’s new with you, pussycats?

  • 15 minute posts,  my books

    Spied any good books lately?

    free-book

    Really? Not a single one? Wait, what was that? You spied a really cool spy book about Paris but you can’t really afford it right now so you haven’t bought it?

    Okay.

    Well, what if I gave you one for free? Just one. It’s been a long time since I’ve given away anything free on this site and I used to think this was a site that had more to offer than just words. So let’s change that!!

    I will send one commenter one free book. I might even throw in some top secret goodies to go with it. All you have to do is comment before next Thursday (I’ll shut comments down at noon) WITH your best spy story.

    I know, I had to go and make it difficult. Just a funny little anecdote to make reading comments more fun. I’ll pick the best story or the best random story or if that’s too hard I’ll use random number generator and announce who gets a free book next Friday.

    You can do it! I think everybody’s got a spy story in them. Surely you’ve spied on your neighbors before, maybe your kids, or your parents or that boy you liked in high school? Share your story and you could win! I’ll even draw you a personalized cartoon on the inside page or have Bug write you special note.

    p.s. If you’ve already bought the book, (Thank you! You make my world go ’round.) you can still comment and win another book and give it away or donate it to your local library. And since we’re talking, could you pretty please leave a review on amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com or wherever it is you bought it. I neeeeeeeed all the reviews I can get. Thank you so much!!