What it means to be ComfortablyCrazy

This post is from my sister-in-law, CC, from Comfortably Crazy. Thank you, CC!

The house is clean—well, mostly—the kids are in bed, and I’m not completely dog-tired.

Instead of working on my aprons, knitting, or reading one of the many books I’m halfway through, I sit here writing this in my journal (because I don’t feel like typing right now), and listening-to-but-not-really-watching the fourth Harry Potter movie yet again.

I know for many people, especially parents, that by the time you have time to do something, you don’t wanna. I hate that. I hate not having the energy to get things done. Having 501 unfinished projects from switching rooms (we do that a lot in our family) to doing my nails.

If you know me, you’re probably sitting in your chair reading this, nodding your head. I am probably the most organized messy person you would ever meet. On any given day if you dropped by my house, you’re guaranteed to find dirty laundry on the floor, possibly in the kitchen; dirty dishes in the sink; stacks of mail to file, or shove in a box or bag; piles of books to read; a jumble of shoes by the piano; and two kids either getting ready to kill each other or getting along reasonably well, depending on the phases of the moon. If you looked at my desk it would likely be covered with a myriad of crap. This is how I live.

Now, please don’t be afraid to stop by for a visit. With just an hour’s notice (or two, pretty please?) I can pull off a small miracle of cleaning and straightening. So just let me know if you’d like to come by sometime, okay?

I know you’re wondering where the “organized” part comes in, so I’ll tell you. If you were to walk into my kids’ rooms you’d see labels on the dressers along with bins for blocks, dolls, balls, dress-up clothes, shoes and various other toys. This is a good and bad thing. Kids like to just put stuff away; I like to put stuff away right. Most times my idea of right and their idea of right are nowhere in the same galaxy.

If you were to look on my computer you’d find documents listing my CDs and DVDs. You can browse CDs by title, genre, or artist; DVDs by genre or title, kid-safe or adult. (I mean “adult” as in Terminator or Resident Evil, not “adult” as in “ducking into a dark alley and buying something I wouldn’t want my neighbors to know about.”) They are all listed and shelved alphabetically. The CDs are numbered and coordinate with the numbers on the player.

At this point, you’re probably wondering why, if I can keep my kids’ rooms, CDs, and DVDs so organized, I cannot keep my entire house this way. It’s pretty simple really. I get distracted, I get sick, or I just plain get lazy.

I do enjoy having a clean house, but honestly, sometimes it stresses me out. Having a perfectly clean house is not comfortable. I’d much prefer to have things tidy than perfect. I’d rather have someone be comfortable with their kid dumping one (or five) bins of blocks on the floor than have them worrying about their kid making a mess.

I know people can have perfectly-kept houses and be happy. I’m just not one of them. I’ve heard of FlyLady, and I’m really not interested. I have to be accountable to me and only me. In that way I am selfish.

That’s how I’m trying to live my life, too. I’m trying to downsize and get rid of things we don’t need. Sometimes this means getting rid of stuff I do not want or need, even if I’ve had it less than a year or it was a birthday or wedding gift. Sometimes, this means buying something newer to make things fit better. There are things I will not get rid of, like my Barbies, my kids’ outgrown clothes, the porta-crib, and the two highchairs. But that’s my choice.

I think I’m finally at a point in my life where I’m comfortable with who I am. I may be overweight, but my kids and husband actually seem to like me this way. I could get down to 136 and be happy. I’d be happier at 126, or even better, 120. So why don’t I lose the weight? Because I know how to dress my body.

At 5’1″ and 156 pounds, I wear a size 14 Short Levis. I wear a large or extra-large maternity shirt. Yes, I just said I wear maternity shirts though I am not pregnant and will never be pregnant again without medical intervention or a miracle.

I’ve been saying for the last year that I should go to Motherhood Maternity to buy my shirts but never did it. Buying the first maternity shirt was accidental. I picked a shirt up at Ross that was just stuck in with the pants. It was cute, so I tried it on and fell in love. Only after buying it and wearing it did I look at the tag to see the label: Haute Maternity.

Now I’m convinced. I will do my shirt shopping in the maternity section, and when they ask when I’m due, I’ll smile sweetly and say, “November 2002.”

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